March 28, 2011 2:43 PM
i.d. said...
"I have a very feminine face that could be considered 'beautiful'. This means I'm unable to 'pass' most of the time, also that some men actually find me attractive despite the fact I have a shaved head and wear men's clothes. I also have gay men trying to hit on me because of my feminine face etc which must make them think I am a young boy etc.
I know Dirt thinks passing isn't a good thing, but frankly, why would I want to live a life of hassle and homophobia by being openly masculine and female. What kind of a life is that eh?"
___________________________________
MasterAmazon's reply:
Well, some gay men's pedophilia really does get to me.... or their worship of very young men....and they DO hit up on Butch Dykes too, including when I was younger and thinner, and almost always on my first partner in SF, who was petite and Butch thinking she was just out of boyhood...which disgusted both of us....that IS a real phenomena, and BEING MEN, they don't have sexual boundaries oftentimes, or respect. One drag queen at the last gay event I went to felt up my Butch partner's nipples as they passed by and I was out of the room. My partner was very upset about it..it was very clear she was a BUTCH DYKE, NOT a dude! And yet, this drag queen felt they had the right and privilege to hit on her....
At the end of the night the drag queen touched my arm, and I said "Don't EVER touch my partner again!". Which makes me NOT want to be in mixed situations with gay men...
But what kind of life can you live as a Butch Female, indeed if that is what you are, which just by what you say you may not be, is living a life of integrity. I was NEVER feminine, maybe at a very young age I didn't object to wearing dresses, because I didn't know about the differences between boys and girls and I hadn't yet felt the deep sting of being treated differently than my brother. I was the older sibling, and I went to an all girls school where we were all equals....it wasn't till I began to realize around age 7 that I was treated differently and forced to play with dolls and do domestic things like cook and clean while my brother didn't have to do either, that I objected...and began to adopt more tomboy ways...I've been a tomboy all my life since then..it's not something 'I decided' to be, like one day you're Butch, the next day Femme or feminine...so what are you saying? That you'd rather stay feminine so the gay boys leave you alone, or you'd rather transition to male, where THEY'D STILL HIT ON YOU, NOW THAT YOU'RE FULLY MALE APPEARING?
Being and staying a Butch Dyke is LIVING a life of integrity, not having to 'pass' either as feminine to survive, like many Butches had to do in the past, especially in regards to work, and could only 'butch it up' in the dyke bar scene, or to submerge my Butch Femaleness by adopting even more male attitudes, hardening myself, or transitioning to male.
So yes, you'd deal with homophobia and hassle being an open Butch FEMALE, rather than passing as either feminine, or transitioning to FTM, but you'd also be living a LIFE OF INTEGRITY, where you did not have to hide who you truly are.
That is why I see most Butch Females as true Amazons, because we are strong, powerful womyn, part of a Sacred Sisterhood of women loving women, throughout time....and that WE ARE NOT ALONE, even if sometimes it feels that way!
-MasterAmazon
Showing posts with label Butch=Amazon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Butch=Amazon. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Sunday, October 3, 2010
My response from Dirt's Blog: Transition is never inevitable, and from me: How to love your Butch Dyke FEMALE Body/Mind/Spirit
I really have to share about this.
My current partner, who is Butch, once she got online, and began to flirt with/cyber other Butch on Butches, so many of them were 10 years or more her junior, were flirting with gender, genderqueering, and then considering transitioning, rather than owning up to the beautiful/handsome WOMEN they are, as Butch Dykes, so eager and ready to trade in their femaleness, kept asking her when SHE was going to transition, ect. ect. ect.
And my partner(before we met) was a LONGTERM BUTCH DYKE OF AT LEAST 15 YEARS OUT!
It was almost like a cult, they draw you in, tell you what you want to hear, 'love bomb' you, and/or flirt with you, acknowledge you as a Butch in ways you've never heard before, but like ALL cults there is a heavy price to pay...
It fucked with her head so bad, she ALMOST considered transitioning, she had packers, and dildos galore, packing everyday with either softies or hardies, even to work, ect. ect. ect, cuz all the rest were doing the same.....that out of all this, she decided not to date anyone for two years so she could figure out where she was at with all this.
This questioning NEVER happened to her UNTIL she got online. Once she got online, the bombardment and pressure to transition or genderqueer was enormous, just like so many of the young ones are getting today, rather than the pride I got through Dykes in the Lesbian movement, where we were going to change the world, as Amazons, as Warriors as "an army of lovers can never fail", an old Lesbian saying that was new back then, well sadly, we HAVE failed. Even though back then what with our new institutions we were quickly creating, lesbian music recording companies, bookstores, events, festivals, printing presses, ect. ect..our OWN cultural institutions BY AND FOR OURSELVES......so many of them gone, gone, gone. Other Butches taught me PRIDE IN BEING FEMALE, a different KIND of Female, with power and strength, and holding our space as the Warriors for Women, the take no bullshit no man is gonna tell me what to do!
Now instead, they're becoming 'men'. That Dyke Female pride has been sadly lost.
Well, she figured out after two years of this journey she DID NOT want to have her breasts cut off, and she was PROUD to be both Butch and Female, she went back to dating both Butches and Femmes. But it was online that fucked with her head, and because she had been a longterm OUT Butch Dyke in a difficult part of the country to be out, she had more strength than most, who have NEVER been out yet as a Butch Dyke, with that kind of Female Dyke herstory...just new on their journey, and detered offcourse and caught up in the promises and excitement of the trans movement. But the price is a heavy one to pay...not just renouncing one's Femaleness, or even Dykeness, but in having one's body physically altered through painful surgeries, and then to go on hormones that do who knows what to the body in the longrun! All that just to 'fit in'?
I for one am glad, and when she met me, as a Female Identified Butch, I told her she didn't have to 'prove' any of this to me. She could put away the dildos and packers and such, and show me her Female side without fear....and we have both found the kind of match that we know these days would be very hard to find 'out there'. We celebrate our Butchness, our Femaleness, our Dykeness and ultimately our Amazon natures together....AS WOMEN. We LOVE each other's FEMALE bodies...instead of despise them, and from each other's admiration of our bodies, we learn to love our own bodies too....
I'm so glad this woman came to her senses through reading your blogs Dirt.
-In Butch DykeAmazon Sisterhood,
-MasterAmazon
My current partner, who is Butch, once she got online, and began to flirt with/cyber other Butch on Butches, so many of them were 10 years or more her junior, were flirting with gender, genderqueering, and then considering transitioning, rather than owning up to the beautiful/handsome WOMEN they are, as Butch Dykes, so eager and ready to trade in their femaleness, kept asking her when SHE was going to transition, ect. ect. ect.
And my partner(before we met) was a LONGTERM BUTCH DYKE OF AT LEAST 15 YEARS OUT!
It was almost like a cult, they draw you in, tell you what you want to hear, 'love bomb' you, and/or flirt with you, acknowledge you as a Butch in ways you've never heard before, but like ALL cults there is a heavy price to pay...
It fucked with her head so bad, she ALMOST considered transitioning, she had packers, and dildos galore, packing everyday with either softies or hardies, even to work, ect. ect. ect, cuz all the rest were doing the same.....that out of all this, she decided not to date anyone for two years so she could figure out where she was at with all this.
This questioning NEVER happened to her UNTIL she got online. Once she got online, the bombardment and pressure to transition or genderqueer was enormous, just like so many of the young ones are getting today, rather than the pride I got through Dykes in the Lesbian movement, where we were going to change the world, as Amazons, as Warriors as "an army of lovers can never fail", an old Lesbian saying that was new back then, well sadly, we HAVE failed. Even though back then what with our new institutions we were quickly creating, lesbian music recording companies, bookstores, events, festivals, printing presses, ect. ect..our OWN cultural institutions BY AND FOR OURSELVES......so many of them gone, gone, gone. Other Butches taught me PRIDE IN BEING FEMALE, a different KIND of Female, with power and strength, and holding our space as the Warriors for Women, the take no bullshit no man is gonna tell me what to do!
Now instead, they're becoming 'men'. That Dyke Female pride has been sadly lost.
Well, she figured out after two years of this journey she DID NOT want to have her breasts cut off, and she was PROUD to be both Butch and Female, she went back to dating both Butches and Femmes. But it was online that fucked with her head, and because she had been a longterm OUT Butch Dyke in a difficult part of the country to be out, she had more strength than most, who have NEVER been out yet as a Butch Dyke, with that kind of Female Dyke herstory...just new on their journey, and detered offcourse and caught up in the promises and excitement of the trans movement. But the price is a heavy one to pay...not just renouncing one's Femaleness, or even Dykeness, but in having one's body physically altered through painful surgeries, and then to go on hormones that do who knows what to the body in the longrun! All that just to 'fit in'?
I for one am glad, and when she met me, as a Female Identified Butch, I told her she didn't have to 'prove' any of this to me. She could put away the dildos and packers and such, and show me her Female side without fear....and we have both found the kind of match that we know these days would be very hard to find 'out there'. We celebrate our Butchness, our Femaleness, our Dykeness and ultimately our Amazon natures together....AS WOMEN. We LOVE each other's FEMALE bodies...instead of despise them, and from each other's admiration of our bodies, we learn to love our own bodies too....
I'm so glad this woman came to her senses through reading your blogs Dirt.
-In Butch DykeAmazon Sisterhood,
-MasterAmazon
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Butch and Proud
Butch and proud, and I've rejected femininity ALL my life. We are another version of Female, and for me, Butch=Amazon, not male, not trans. Period. There is no other definition of womonhood that even comes close to it for me....and I also lust and love other Butch Dykes....who are out loud and proud, both about being Butch and being Dykes, and while I don't agree with the butch writer on "Dykes Loving Dykes" Bev Jo on some matters, I found that section of her book very, very validating on Butch oppression. It is NOT something we can put on and take off..it is who we are at our core, since a very young age...at 7 rejecting dolls, at 10, dresses, at 12 never wanting to marry a man or have children, and always taking up my space, doing ice hockey when no other girl in the entire league did, and karate even full contact, when no other female in the dojo would, at the age of 15...and severely censored and harassed by family members, classmates, and teachers and the world for not being properly 'feminine'. I was a lifelong hardcore tomboy who grew up to be a Butch Dyke and when I came out I found a place that honored me, in a way no other culture or subculture does....along with other Butches.
As Female Identified Butches, we ARE organizing and taking back our identities, one Butch Dyke at a time.
-In Sisterhood,
-FeistyAmazon
As Female Identified Butches, we ARE organizing and taking back our identities, one Butch Dyke at a time.
-In Sisterhood,
-FeistyAmazon
Monday, January 4, 2010
Butch=Amazon
Neverspeak in her blog posits the question 'What is a Butch?', if a Butch isn't 'masculine' then what is she? Here is my answer:
January 4, 2010 at 5:45 am
For me, according to your analysis above, but that few Butches these days ascribe to, is that Butch=Amazon, the original defiers of male imposed roles, laws, ability to love women, become Warriors, and live their lives as equals to any man alive…with their own strength, power and courage with many of the positive traits men are often ascribed and women are not….so, for me, I’ve come to the conclusion, heart, body, mind and soul, with much study, ritual, affirmation and teaching of Amazon mysteries, as well as years and years in the Martial Arts, and being out as a Dyke brought out by the Dyke Witches, one who greatly influenced me who was Butch, that modern day Butch=Amazon. It fits and works for me, and I am identified and recognized as such.
I am a Female Identified Butch, therefore, for me, because my first love and loyalty is to other Dykes and women, and the Goddess in all Her Forms, and Mother Earth, and recognition of the power of Sisterhood together, in ritual and in friendship, I am Amazon. And I am definitely Butch and have been all my life(from tomboy to Butch), and especially since I entered the martial arts at the tender age of 14, at puberty. I set upon Her Path as Her Female Warrior….little did I know at the time…until I came out at 21, with the Dyke Witches, but didn’t figure it all out till some years later…
This does not preclude those Femmes who also claim an Amazon identity, but for me, first and foremost, those Butches who aren’t male identified, who are strongly Female Identified…they really are truly Amazons in my book..and especially because of all the heat we take for being who and what we are in life. Women who love womyn who won’t be contained by the rules and boxes men would attempt to put us in…we’re wild and free and untamed, like our Amazon sisters before us….
-In Sisterhood,
-M.A.
January 4, 2010 at 5:45 am
For me, according to your analysis above, but that few Butches these days ascribe to, is that Butch=Amazon, the original defiers of male imposed roles, laws, ability to love women, become Warriors, and live their lives as equals to any man alive…with their own strength, power and courage with many of the positive traits men are often ascribed and women are not….so, for me, I’ve come to the conclusion, heart, body, mind and soul, with much study, ritual, affirmation and teaching of Amazon mysteries, as well as years and years in the Martial Arts, and being out as a Dyke brought out by the Dyke Witches, one who greatly influenced me who was Butch, that modern day Butch=Amazon. It fits and works for me, and I am identified and recognized as such.
I am a Female Identified Butch, therefore, for me, because my first love and loyalty is to other Dykes and women, and the Goddess in all Her Forms, and Mother Earth, and recognition of the power of Sisterhood together, in ritual and in friendship, I am Amazon. And I am definitely Butch and have been all my life(from tomboy to Butch), and especially since I entered the martial arts at the tender age of 14, at puberty. I set upon Her Path as Her Female Warrior….little did I know at the time…until I came out at 21, with the Dyke Witches, but didn’t figure it all out till some years later…
This does not preclude those Femmes who also claim an Amazon identity, but for me, first and foremost, those Butches who aren’t male identified, who are strongly Female Identified…they really are truly Amazons in my book..and especially because of all the heat we take for being who and what we are in life. Women who love womyn who won’t be contained by the rules and boxes men would attempt to put us in…we’re wild and free and untamed, like our Amazon sisters before us….
-In Sisterhood,
-M.A.
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